Computer Game Addiction

For the last few months I have gotten into these free trial downloads of games on the computer. Some of them say that it is just an hour but you can keep playing for longer and get through several layers of levels.
I started doing the hidden object games and various other types. But the “Match 3” seems to be my poison.
It really goes back and forth on my addiction of them. Sometimes I am ok and other times I am obsessed. Yes, today was that day. It was a gorgeous day outside too. I could have: gone on a real walk with Ozzy, worked in the yard since there is more than enough work for a full time grounds keeper, actually gone outside and played it outside (duh) I have a laptop (double-duh).
I really try not to do it. I usually think, oh, I will just play one more level, then, the next thing you know…hours of unaccounted for time. I have so many projects I can be working on besides the mentioned above. Cleaning the house would have been a good idea too. Shhh, don’t tell Joe. Hey, at least it isn’t cocaine or porn. I will keep you posted on my recovery.

Not All Khakis Fit the Same

Last night I grabbed from the ironing board, my khakis. I was setting aside my work clothes to do a massage event for today. So this morning, I was putting my khaki pants on and walking across the room at the same time to save time. Wow, what happened I thought to myself? These pants are big! I must have lost a lot of weight from just last week! How, my wishing it away finally worked?! Cool!…oh…they are Joe’s khakis, damn.

I Hate May, Not Spring

Before I get into all of my rambles, I must thank all who have served and are currently our country and given my family and me this great USA. Happy belated Memorial Day! I wish everyone could be at home too.

May has been a terrible month for Joe and me (and our family). We have had two huge losses from our lives, Ma Dillier (Joe’s Mother) and Griz Lee (our dog for 9 years, he was 10). In general May is a bad because there are numerous deaths of various months past such as my Dad in ‘01, my Aunt Ellen’s 1st husband in ’78, a family friend Jeanne, I can’t place the year and there are more that have details I am not sure of.

This Memorial Day weekend was the 1st time that we went to St. George since we lost Griz. I couldn’t even park in the same spot in the condo. Every time Ozzy jumped in or out of the truck I cringed. I can’t bear to think of losing Ozzy right now either.

Joe wouldn’t like to have me retell the story, but I have to. He hates it when I cry, part of it is a guy thing, the rest is too much to discuss here. This is a process for me; sorry you are along for the ride. Just like Dad’s death and week in the VA ICU, the 48 of that weekend was just Hell. Both were all of the sudden.

In a way I let go of Dad again with Griz’s death. There is no power in the power to have to take someone you love off of life support or put a family pet down. Even when you know, there is nothing you or modern medicine can do for them, the sickening pain echoes. It is a ripple on a lake. You think you are fine and it splashes back upon you suddenly like a tsunami. You want to ask them a question or tell them something and you can’t. Take time to forgive and say what you need to now while they are with you. I did get a chance with Dad a couple years before he died. His rehab program had family counseling.

I urge you to find some counseling for yourself before you can’t just track down someone to tell them. As bad as my Dad was, he found his good again in AA. Life is too short to hold onto something that is a haze over every emotion. Forgiving someone is also easier after you forgive yourself. Well enough of my 2 cent psychiatrist session.

Anyhew, I am glad May is almost over and summer can begin. Hopefully Joe’s business and my business will pick up so we can live our normal fun summer lifestyle.

The End is the Beginning and Joining the Blog-wagon

So I have been gonna write a Blog for a LONG time but here we go. I am joining the Blog-Borg or Blog-A-Demic or really the Blog-Wagon.
An obituary is not a completion of life. I have never been an obit reader, either you are or are not. It is just like beets and Julia Roberts, you like them or not, you do or you don’t.
This is the beginning of my BLOG. Unfortunately it is the end of a woman’s life. Not just a woman, it was my husband’s mother. Today (well, yesterday, May 22) we had a graveside of sorts for Joe’s mother today. JP gave a prayer for our family and his Grandmother. We all had a few fun stories to tell about her. Present, the in town locals: Joe, me, my Mother, John, Jamie, Heidi, JP, Stephani, Lucille, Bobby, JoDelene, Barbara and Lucille’s daughters Karen and Chris.
We all got together after at our house too for something to “chew on” (a Louise-ism) and look through her many photo albums. See my pictures at my FlickR pics, search people for mrsjwd9.
Joe’s number ONE fan was his mother. She was always proud. Every story I have heard of her was about her support of him. I loved to hear him on the phone talking to her on the phone.
I invite you to read just a tidbit of what her grand children have written about her on the obituary guestbook on the Salt Lake City Tribune (published 5/18/08).
My daughter “Little” Jen (ok STEP-daughter) wrote in her Blog about how wonderful her Grandma Dillier was and how I am in training. Well I have a long way to go. The woman was the best Grandma ever! She was always sending birthday cards with money, Christmas cards with cash (or gift certificate and cherry cordials. But it can’t be defined just by those instances of events. Hell, her photos are all in albums and are labeled and I have just begun!
Louise was a great woman I wrote her obituary, to follow below. Don’t expect much. I kept it cheap, you know, under 500 clams. Newspapers and funeral homes are a rip. BTW - Sorry if you are offended with anything I write. I can’t be responsible for my need for true expression. I guess that is a little why my husband likes me. I am a lot like his mother. I tell it like it is. She always let you know when she didn’t like your hair style but at the same time was self critical like any woman. She was an artist in my opinion. She was damn good Mother and Grandma. Maybe she wasn’t perfect, but she was true to being herself and not budging on not being anything but.
Gaila “Louise” Dillier
Born October 18, 1923 in Osgood, Missouri – Died May 14, 2008 in Salt Lake City, Utah.
Louise is preceded in death by her parents, Joseph Earl and Marie Long; her husband, Joseph Dillier, Sr.; and her daughter, Anna Marie Dillier-Davis.
She is survived by her siblings, Lucille Bianchi, Robert Long, JoDelene Nielson, and Barbara Christensen; her children, Charles (Joyce), Gary (Tonya), and Joseph, Jr. (Jennifer); 11 grandchildren, and 15 great-grandchildren.
Her collections and stuffed animal creations will be treasured and fondly remembered. We will truly miss her “tell you straight” approach to life.
Louise’s courageous struggle with Alzheimer’s has ended. In lieu of flowers, please donate to the Alzheimer’s Association.
Interment at Wasatch Lawn Memorial Park, Garden of the Roses Mausoleum.